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ASK MERRILY/How to Leave

Posted on Jan 13,2010
Filed Under Personal Development , Opinions,

Photo by Local Kicks<br /> <br />Home, sweet home; the Ariail residence in Old Town. <br />
Photo by Local Kicks
Home, sweet home; the Ariail residence in Old Town.

ALEXANDRIA, VA. - I feel buried by pesky issues involved in following my heart to the West.  The county has appraised my house at nearly $100,000 less than I owe.  What happens if I sell owing so much?

I suppose I need to do the ‘manifesting-intentions’ exercise again. I panic periodically.  Finding a job here doesn't interest me. May will be here in the blink of an eye with my paychecks drying up and then what? I am doing a lot of soul searching.  Why are we on this earth if we owe so much and are buried in so much stuff that we forget why we're here in the first place?

Dear Forget,
Excellent, soul searching questions.  Financial pressures can feel quite smothering.  Research your options to appreciate their consequences.

Considerations:  You could hire a property manager to rent your house.  You could follow advice of some current financial advisors who say it is not financially sound to remain in a house that is upside-down.  But, before considering foreclosure, know whether your state allows banks to go after your other assets.  Many home owners of retirement age who are in your situation walk away.  The moral dilemma is somewhat obscured by the banks’ irresponsible lending practices. If you consider bankruptcy, buy what you need now, as your credit score will need time to recover.  If you want to liquidate furniture and household items, they can be listed for sale and for free on Craig’s list.  

Charities will take saleable items.  If you really liked your house and were not ready to leave, you could stay with fingers crossed that the value would eventually increase.   
Write your intention to choose the option in your highest interest and to manifest your true work rather than a job.  Intentions need monthly editing.  Remember that during major transitions emotions naturally swing from panic to assurance.  Stay with and breathe into whichever emotion is up.  Read the column Terror. Act with decisiveness before you really do forget why you are on the earth.  It’s easy to settle back into a situation that no longer serves.  Keep in touch.

Merrily Preston is an Intentional Life Facilitator, who lives in Woodbridge. Her column is exclusive to Local Kicks.  Email questions to, or use online form at

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